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No One Wants a Crabby Mom.

Posted By Jessica Fisher On June 30, 2009 @ 12:35 pm In Parenting and Family | 13 Comments

That’s the point of this blog. Those are the words that you – and I – see every time the page loads. No one wants a crabby mom. But, unfortunately, that’s what my kids get sometimes.

When instructing my children to follow directions, I tell them that there are three parts of OBEY: all the way, right away, and most importantly, (are you ready?) with a good attitude!

How we do something is often just as important as actually doing it. No one said motherhood would be easy. And most moms I know do what they’re “supposed to do.” But, doing it with a good attitude is sometimes tricky.

This past Saturday I found myself snappish, short tempered, quick to anger, basically — crabby! I haven’t felt quite like that in awhile. But, the reality of it showed in the surprise in my kids’ eyes when I freaked out over a shrunken, wool sweater that no one had ever worn, yet had been thrown in the washing machine anyway. I generally come undone over washing something that’s clean already. Ruining the item adds insult to injury.

Yet my mind goes to an old cliche: don’t sweat the small stuff. There’s wisdom there, people.

Often, I think I get crabby because things aren’t going my way. But, is it over monumental things gone awry? Am I turned inside out and sideways over major things? Rarely. Usually I’m “freaking out” over something that is not really important. I’m sweating small stuff that doesn’t really matter. But, my response can have such a greater, negative impact than the offense.

Here are my “notes to self” -

1. Calm down, take a deep breath, leave the room, count to ten, whatever it takes.
2. Ask yourself if this is really worth the emotion it’s generating.
3. If it is, politely talk about it with the offender. If not, shake it off.
4. If you’ve already “freaked out,” been unkind, blamed for more than was necessary, ask forgiveness and admit where you’re wrong.
5. Repeat as often as necessary.

Being a cheerful mom is worth so much more, feels so much better, brings more comfort and joy to my family than one sweater that no one wanted to wear anyway.

What area do you “freak” in? How do you gain perspective?

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