Do They Know You Love Your Life?

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Do your kids know that you love your life, specifically your life with them?

Do your kids know that you love your life, specifically your life with them?

Sometime in the last week my eldest son, almost 17, said, “You always seem sad and depressed these days.”

He said this with a little sadness in his own voice. It was just the two of us in the kitchen, early in the morning. It gave me pause. I don’t feel sad and depressed. I just feel busy, overwhelmed, weighed down.

For better or worse, I’m in “survival mode” this month. Working on three cookbooks in one year was probably not the best decision I ever made. It somehow “happened”. And since I want them to be great books, I’ve spent a fair amount of time in the kitchen or at the computer.

My cup runneth over in all kinds of good ways, as well as in challenging ones. I’m always thinking of the next thing to do or puzzling out a problem, whether that’s cookbook-related, homeschooling, household, parenting, marriage, life.

I’m surviving; thank you, Jesus.

Whether you write cookbooks or have some other weight on you, each of us has periods of survival mode. Kids don’t often understand what that looks like.

FishBoy16 and I chatted about it throughout the day. I had a chance to tell him how much I love him and our life together, to reassure him that my seriousness doesn’t reflect what he thought it did. Likewise, I was able to tease him when he had a serious visage and ask him if he was feeling sad. He laughed and said no.

It was a good reminder for me to make sure that my outsides reflect my insides — at least when my insides are mostly positive!

It was also a great reminder to show my kids

  • that I love my life with them.
  • that I’m glad to have chose this path of spending my days with them.
  • that I still enjoy having fun.
  • that I can be light-hearted and joke around even if there’s a lot on my plate.

Clearly, I don’t have this thing figured out, but I’m so proud that my son felt comfortable to share his observations with me. Here’s to lightening the mood around here!

How do YOU make sure your kids know you love your life?

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  1. Thank you. I so needed this today. I struggle with seeking the joy and not falling into sadness. I do love my life and want to focus on that and be sure i express that with my outsides.

    I have been a reader for years and adore with the freezer cookbook. You are inspiring and enriching lives with the work you do. I pray joy wash over you and your family.

    Thanks again!

  2. This post really resonated with me. Just last week, I found myself thinking that I need to smile more around the house. I think my “I’m busy-I have to make dinner-we’re going to be late to swim class” face ends up looking a lot more sour than I really feel inside. It is so important that my kids know that I like their company, and maybe that’s not as visible as it could be at times. Thanks for the reminder!

  3. Yup. Guilty as charged. I sometimes can’t remember the last time I smiled at or with my kids. Newly separated from my husband, I am trying very hard to not always be serious mom. The pressure of a failing marriage over the past several years has not made me a fun mom. That has to change. I am vowing that now that I am free of that stress amd sadness, I am determined to bring the fun and joy that I have not been able to give them. I love your blog…your posts are always so perfectly timed to what I need to hear. Thank you.

    1. Sounds like you are on the right track. Blessings to you as you carve a new path! God knows what we need. Glad he used this post to fill that for you! Thanks so much for your kind words!

  4. what a wonderful post. i was walking through the store the other day and a stranger stopped me and said, “is it really that bad.” talk about a wake up call. i’m rather serious by nature, and it often shows on my face. for some reason, the joy i feel every day doesn’t show as readily. it’s something i’m really trying to work on.

  5. So thankful you and your son had such a special conversation. Thanks for sharing with us these helpful reminders!

    PS Guessing a high percentage of the parents in the wildfire zone were pretty serious/intense this week. =S

      1. =) well then, perhaps it helped prepare you for the rest of the week. love you.

  6. Wow! This was an awesome wake up call for me. Thanks for sharing this. Sometimes it’s hard to take a step back and realize how we may appear or come off to others…to our own kids and pretty much any one we come in contact with. I’m in the process of changing the ways we do some of our routines and stuff…becoming more intentional and positive in all our actions and this was a great reminder for me to incorporate that for myself. It is so easy to become swept up and distracted in just getting through the morning, day, week…and in that I am afraid I am so guilty of my kids seeing a mommy who is mostly stressed out, racing around trying to get us out the door, in the door…just getting us through. This post was a great call for me to lovingly engage more with my kids. Perfect timing, once again. 🙂 thank you!

  7. Thank you for sharing this and for this reminder. We are in a very busy, intense time of life right now and the weight of that stress combined with a recent injury I am dealing with, have no doubt left a look of worry, strain and sadness on my weary face too. I needed this reminder and I need to be intentional about finding some joy in the everyday and making sure to share that with my family!

  8. That is so great that you your son is so open with you! That’s awesome! I need to watch how my mood is toward my kids… all the things you listed. Thanks the reminder!

  9. Such a good reminder. I have the quote below pop up on my phone because I need to be reminded daily! 🙂

    Everything I do, good or bad, is teaching my children about life, God, parenting, and effecting their future.

    I also have 1 Thessalonians 5:17-18 pop up daily.

      1. If you have an iPhone, press on reminders app, press + in top right corner, and write or paste text you want. Then, press > and set for day and time and set on repeat.

  10. Thank you Jessica for this beautiful post. I will ponder this wisdom in my heart. I love all the pictures of your family too.

  11. Thanks so much for this post. I needed to hear this also. I don’t think I always portray happiness or joy to my kids either. Great reminder!

  12. l like to lean down at random times and whisper things in my daughter’s ear. Things like “You’re the best thing that ever happened to me”, “l love being your mama”, “You are a delight”, “l love our life together”. l feel like it’s also a good reminder for me to remember to be grateful.