TGIF: Let Daddy Do It

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One of my children’s greatest entertainments is time spent with their dad. They have all sorts of traditions and rituals, like FBA Meetings, Monkey Treats and the Choosing Game. Of the two of us, my husband is more adventurous. It’s a good balance for my kids to have calm, stay-at-home-ishness with me and climb-every-mountain-ness with him.

Dads just do things differently. They play “Run Away Horse.” They wrestle. They play video games. They go hiking and biking and fishing.

(OK, maybe some of you ladies do all those things. But, this Mama don’t.)

It can be difficult at first for a mom to relinquish her children to the sole care of her husband. I remember being so nervous about letting him take our first baby out to coffee with the guys. But, our pediatrician had said to just let them do guy things. I am glad to have had her advice.

Today I am headed out with FishBaby for an extended time away at the WholeHearted Mother conference. My husband will be flying solo with the five older children. And I know they will have a great time. I am nervous about leaving, but I know the world will go on without me.

So, let Daddy do it.

No, your husband won’t do things the way you do. But, it’s supposed to be that way. Relax. Let your husband lead the entertainments. Step out of the way when he wants to teach them a new skill. Your family will benefit in ways you can’t imagine.

How ’bout it? What do you see that your husband provides that you can’t? Let’s give thanks that our men are different than us!

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  1. Have fun this weekend at your conference and thank you for recognizing these wonderful dads we have around the house :). My husband is such a great dad and just like you said, he does things I would never do, which the kids love. He is definitely more adventurous, more fun, but importantly more PATIENT. He sees their side in many ways that sometimes I just can’t. He undersatands that sometimes its just tough to go to sleep and you want to be in bed with your parents, he knows how it feels to do certain things that I don’t know anything about. He loves our girls and has my vote for #1 Dad. But I bet he has some competition out there!!

  2. My suggestion to new moms is always “Let Dad take the baby so you can have arms for a bit.” Even if the baby cries the minute your husband holds her, they need to learn to get along, and he needs to have confidence in his parenting. Usually I get a flabbergasted stare and complaints that Dad will hand the baby back the minute she starts crying. Or, “Oh I could never do that.” I’m so glad I’m not the only one with a loving, helpful partner.

  3. Great advice for new Moms. Our daughter is 2 1/2 and I love to sit and watch her and her father. Men really do see things differently and can be amazing!

  4. I'm so glad my husband isn't one of "those" 🙂 who is afraid to help out or just plain doesn't want to. Especially with my 3 yr old son, I see the special bond he's created as a result of doing lots of "daddy time." Yes, there are many moments when I just turn my head, because it's too scary to know what they're doing. (Like the time my son came in from outside & told me that Daddy had put him in the wagon & pulled him down our really steep hill…among others!) Kids, especially boys, need that sense of adventure & Man-ness that we moms just can't provide.

    I was always amazed at my friends who told me that if they ever got a night off, they'd have to lay everything out (food, jammies, toothbrushes, etc) because their husbands didn't have a clue. I think that's partially the dad's fault, but also the mom's fault. We moms have to say "it's okay" with dads & give them some slack too. We don't do everything perfectly and neither will they! So some mismatched pajamas or too-short-pants really aren't the end of the world. 🙂

  5. When I had my baby my sister came to stay with me for a week. She willingly left her family vacation in the mountains to come be with me. She left her husband with their two boys to “fend for themselves” for a few days in a cabin in the woods. She came back to find out that when Mom was heading back they scurried to get showered and teeth brushed. Who knows when the last time it was they did either. But, they had so much fun being MEN with their Dad. They had GUY TIME and they still talk about it 2.5 years later. I look forward to my boy spending more guy time with his Daddy…camping, fishing, etc. It will be great!

  6. As I write this my husband took our two older children on a nature walk with the dog. I take them on walks too, but not with the dog. And I am more “protective”. Daddy is the outdoorsman. The adventurer. I was nervous with our first child, but now I see how much they benefit from our different styles. When I am gone they may not get scrubbed as well in the tub, but they have a blast with daddy. I think a big mistake mom’s make is treating daddy like a child and not letting him be hands on! So he may not do exactly like you do it, but the kids will survive and have great memories too!