Time for MOM: Prioritizing

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The continuing saga of learning to be a woman you can count on.

My husband and I are having an ongoing conversation about priorities. It’s “ongoing” for a number of reasons, one being that it’s difficult to complete a sentence, let alone a conversation in a busy household where there are diapers to change, fights to referee, and children to love.

It’s also “ongoing” because we haven’t figured it out. We’re working through it. And though he has a hormonal, overly sensitive wife, my hubby is proving how fine he is, by being patient with me.

Our family life is still in transition since we grew and moved across country. Truth be told, the new normal is “just getting by”. I’m spinning lots of plates and, quite honestly, one or two are spinning nicely, a few are wobbling, and some have crashed to the ground with a loud clatter.

Recently, I ordered business cards and for title I put “wife, mother, writer, blogger.” I knew that, professionally, this might raise a few eyebrows. When asked about it, I fumbled for a response. I’m embarassed to say that I didn’t know how to explain that choice — until I was driving home from a meeting.

I put those in order of my priorities. Well, at least in order of what I want my priorities to be. I want to be the wife for whom

Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.

She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.

I want my kids to know that they are more important to me than the dishes, the laundry, or my blog. And when they doubt that, my priorities might be misplaced. How do I find them again?

When things get like this, it’s time for me to reevaluate. I sit down and write out the most important things to me so that I can spend my time on the most important things. My list might not look like yours. But, here it is to give you an idea of what I’m talking about.

Loving God More – Am I reading Scripture, learning, praying?
Loving My Husband – Does he have my attention when he needs it? Can he count on me to do what I say I will do? Do we have special time alone? Does he feel like he’s more important than other, less important things?
Loving My Children – Do they know that they mean more to me than the dishes, the laundry, my blog? Do they know they can come talk to me about anything? Have we had one-on-one time today?
Practicing Good Stewardship – Are we on track with our budget? Are we generous in sharing with others? Are we keeping waste in check?
Working Diligently – Am I teaching school to the best of my ability? Am I caring for my household (cleaning, organizing, cooking, shopping?) Am I writing to bring glory to God and encouragement to others ?
Caring for My Physical Health – Am I eating well and exercising?

I now have a more detailed map of how to spend my days. I know that I won’t hit every point perfectly. But, I need to know where I’m going.

What about you? Have you thought about what’s most important to you and your family?

Spend a few minutes and write down your top three. (You can look at the chart I often use for this exercise here.) Then, audit how you’ve been spending your time recently. Have the most important priorities received the lion’s share of your time and attention?

How are things going in your prioritizing? Tell us in the comments.

Part Eight: Your Turn to Chime In

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  1. You bring up some very good points. As I sit here reading this, I wander how well I prioritize. I’m drowning in a struggle with my kids, that I don’t know where to go with it. I have 3 kids that fight nonstop, and are just above the norm of acting out lately. I just want to get pass the crazy screaming person I am… but how to get there? So, I often wander a lot of the same things you do. I wish you luck! 🙂

  2. I love this post. I have been really struggling with these same issues lately. What are my priorities? I really need to sit down and reflect on this. Thank you for this wonderful post.

    And by the way, I left you an award on my blog 😉

    Take Care.

  3. What a timely post! Very well said!

    I have been struggling with this very thing…trying to make sure that I am doing what I need to be doing every day first before doing those things like blogging that can take a back seat.

    Thanks for the encouragement to really take the time to step back and evaluate to make sure that I have my priorities in the correct order. 🙂

  4. Like the others have said, I too am struggling with this very thing. With so many things going on in our lives right now I find that our home is chaotic, I am in a yelling frenzy most of the time and my children are acting out A LOT! My husband even rebuked me on this very matter today. I praise God that I have a husband willing to call me my sin in a loving manner. I need to do sit down and prioritize my life as well. So many areas are upside down! Thanks for the reminder and encouragement!!

  5. Love this post! It’s so true and what I want as well. I think I am going to print it out so I can be reminded of it often. Thanks!
    God bless,
    P.S. I also feel like I am spinning several plates and some are not going very well. I’m glad to know I’m not the only one feeling that way.