To Tell the Truth and Nothing But the Truth?

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Are you willing to tell the truth? The whole truth and nothing but? Or will you tell it with a little bit of something extra?

To Tell the Truth | Life as Mom

I’ve been thinking about truth a lot lately. You see, sometime last year, or maybe it was over the last five years, I got to the point where honesty mattered more to me than what people thought of me. Dangerous waters, my friends.

Maybe it was the whole hyperthyroid thing that pushed me over the edge, but I got to the point where I just up and said, “Life is too short to live with lies.”

Of course, once one comes to this place in life, one realizes that not every one wants to speak in terms of harsh realities. We’re all walking different paths, and sometimes bluntness isn’t well accepted.

This winter in my Bible study we’re studying Philemon, the 1,2,3 Johns, and Jude. In the intro to our study guide, it said, “Truth without love is harsh, and love without truth lacks sincerity.”

Let’s just sit with that one for a minute.

Truth without love is harsh, and love without truth lacks sincerity.

That is a good one. It’s one that I’ve been thinking on for the last month. I guess you could say that somewhere in the last few years I got fed up with insincerity. No more! Away from me, foul deceptions!

However, in my truth telling, I often forget to season my words with love. I forget that others aren’t in this same truth-at-all-costs place. I forget that it’s not just children who need it in this way.

We all do.

We need to grapple with the truth. There is such a thing as truth, even in 2017 America. It is there, but we need to uncover it from under the layers of perspective and feeling and misunderstanding. We need to dig down deep at it together.

When we find a gem of truth, we need not to fling it in the faces of those who couldn’t see it before or even those who refuse to see it still, but we need to lovingly show them the truth, as if it were a precious treasure.

Because it is.

I’m still figuring this thing out: how to tell the truth without being harsh. I know it’s possible, and I know it’s important. I’m just not there yet.

I hope I will be someday soon.

P.S. And yes, I’m trying out the whole neckerchief thing. You can laugh or say you don’t like it. I’m okay with the truth. 😉

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  1. I honestly love the scarf! It really helps to pull the outfit together, but then again, I’m French! (and wear a lot of scarves) : )

  2. I like the scarf! And, I would say this has been and will be a life long, day-by-day issue for me. I’m just finishing up memorizing Ephesians 4, and I’m blown away with how many times Paul exhorts God’s people to put off falsehood, to speak the truth, to speak the truth in love!

  3. Great, post, Jessica. I have a feeling I’ll be noodling on this one for more than a few days.

    One thing that already has me thinking when you mention that truth and also love is the motivation for truth-telling. Shouldn’t it be love? And, if so, then of course love should be in the delivery. (which doesn’t always make it easier) If we aren’t telling something out of love, then why are we saying it/ sharing it?

    Thanks for making me think. Love you!

    1. oops– almost forgot:
      I DO love the scarf! You look fantastic and I think you just might inspire me to pull out all my old neck scarves and give them a go, too. 🙂

  4. Speaking the truth in love and with kindness! Those are great words to ponder. I don’t have trouble telling the truth, but the kindness and love part needs work. A lot of work!
    I like the scarf!!

  5. Once again, amazing post. I felt convicted instantly, now I need to ponder and let it sink in. Oh, I love the scarf. I scarves mentioned in GYPO, and thought, no way can I do that. Now I totally want to try. You look darling and oh so chic.

  6. I struggle with the kindness part also 🙁 Nice post! Love the scarf and glasses!! I’m going tomorrow to have my eyes checked—figured it was time to stop having my son read the labels for me at the store!

  7. The scarf is your nod to your love of France!

    I’ve always been a very honest person, so saying it with love or kindness is something I’ve been doing (or at least trying to do) for decades now. However, some people will not like truth no matter how nicely it’s said. Sometimes the truth hurts, and people don’t want to hear it or accept it, no matter how kindly said.

    On the flip side, I’d like some honesty from others! Sometimes, I think under the guise of being nice, people give “lipservice.” For example, if you don’t want to get together, just say so. Admit that you are too busy for a new friend! Don’t say it sounds like a great idea and then neglect the invitation or only ever have excuses. Just be honest! I’d rather know where I stand with people rather than having to guess when words and actions don’t align.

    1. Do you really want someone to say that they are too busy to pursue a friendship with you? I’ve hated it when people have said that to me. I want honestly, but not when it’s unnecessarily hurtful.

  8. Dangerous waters, I agree. I’ve experienced varying levels of this and I’m definitely more blunt and direct by nature. Learning to give a kind, loving delivery without watering down what is true is difficult, and so often people can get hung up on the delivery part and ignore the meat of what is being said. I know I have room to grow. But yes, absolute truth exists and is worth searching for (and listening to)!

    And for my money, the scarf is great but the GLASSES are what really rock!

  9. Even harder is knowing when to keep quiet. Sometimes the truth is loudest when it is silent, as when you know someone is not ready or willing to hear the truth. It has taken me years (still working on it VERY hard) to speak the truth and then WAIT, rather than “speak the truth and don’t stop speaking until they believe it.” In that case, it’s best to wait patiently and wait until the horse is ready to drink from the water. (For the record: I’ve been both the person who won’t stop speaking and the person who won’t listen.)

    I love the neckerchief.