The holidays can be a stressful time. We have family to see, gifts to buy, and cookies to bake. There’s a fair amount of emotional issues that get stirred up between Thanksgiving and New Year’s, too. Memories of holidays past or family get-togethers can spark controversy and stress.
That’s why it’s all the more important to care for your spouse this season. And that’s not always easy.
We don’t always agree, do we? We don’t always understand the pressures that the other might feel. We aren’t always good at communicating.
But, doing hard things is good. Especially if the hard things bring us a better marriage or a better family life.
I am no expert. I still aggravate my husband from time to time, and vice versa. But, we’re in it for the long haul.
Life is full of hard things, it only makes sense that marriage might be, too. We can look back at the hard times of life and see how God has orchestrated our paths to make us stronger. The same holds true for marriage. * Working through hard things can make a marriage better.
It’s worth the effort.
Like I said, I’m not an expert, but after almost 20 years I’ve learned a few things that help me love my husband more and care for him during a crazy season.
1. Speak my mind.
Last time I checked, he really couldn’t read my mind. It helps him if I tell him what I’m thinking and what I want. He can’t help me if he doesn’t know I need help.
2. Overlook an offense.
I tend to have thin skin. I realize this about myself and have to remind myself not to get overwrought when my feelings get hurt. Usually it’s over something trivial and not worth making a federal case out of.
However, #1 says, “speak your mind.” Speak your mind over important matters and be quick to forgive the others.
3. Be available.
Even the most attentive of spouses can get caught up in things. It’s really, really important to carve out times to talk and just relax together.
4. Look for the win-win.
Life is full of compromise. In marriage, though, there are plenty of ways to problem solve where you can both get what you want. But, you have to talk it out, have thick skin, and be together enough to understand one’s hopes for a certain situation.
5. Go to bed early.
Here are some other past posts to help you care for your spouse this season: