How to Plan a Budget Wedding
As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. For more details, please see our disclosure policy.
It is possible to host a beautiful wedding without spending a million dollars. Here’s how we did it on a “smaller” budget.
Want to save this post?
Enter your email below and get it sent straight to your inbox. Plus, I'll send you time- and money-saving tips every week!
Eighteen years ago this weekend we got hitched after only four months’ engagement. Yes, it was short. We had dated for two years, though, and once you find the person that you want to spend the rest of your life with, well, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible. (Name that movie.)
In that 3.5 months’, pre-internet, pre-pinterest time period, we planned a beautiful wedding. It was by far, the best day of my life, featuring the best wedding food I think I’ve ever eaten, and definitely the best cake.
And we did it on a budget.
Weddings are expensive.
My dad was willing to pay for a wedding for his eldest of three daughters, but he wasn’t going to be extravagant. I groaned with dismay when he set the limit at $5000.
To give you perspective on that number, the average wedding expenditure today is $27,000. The average wedding cost in 1990 was $15,000. So, even though plenty of people have tied the knot for less than $5K, Dad’s number was still pretty low for the time, 1994.
Quite honestly, I was fit to be tied, but there was little I could do about it — unless I wanted to wait and save up more cash. Which I didn’t. Hehe.
Instead, a few years later I lobbied for my youngest sister to get a COLA on her wedding budget. Her budget was $8000 in 2001. And my sister Jamie spent only $3000 on her recent wedding reception. Dad got like three weddings for the price of one!
That said…. today I’m thankful that I wasn’t allowed free reign to spend more than we needed to on a beautiful wedding day. Here are some of my thoughts on the subject, almost twenty years later.
You might already be married, but chances are you have siblings, children, or nieces and nephews that aren’t.
How to plan a budget wedding:
1. Keep perspective.
One thing that I wish I had remembered and am now passing on to others is that this shindig is not all about you. This is a hard thing for brides to come to terms with. We imagine the day all our lives as the day we get to shine like a princess. And while I’ve been there, I also think it’s important to keep things in perspective.
A wedding is a celebration of a new life, a blending of two families, and a transition of roles. While the bride is a princess, she is also not the only who cares about this special day.
So, brides, don’t be a spoiled brat. Be prepared to compromise and consider the needs, wants, and personalities of both families. Keep in mind the sheer amount of money that’s at stake, also. My sister Janel now says she’d rather have that cash to spend on a really nice vacation!
Enough is as good as a feast.
2. Enlist friends to help.
Canvas your friends to find out who is willing and able to help with your wedding event. Guess what? You don’t need a wedding planner. Really. Instead draw from the wealth of skills and talents among those close to you. An older, married friend served as my coordinator. Since I lived with her and her family, she was right there to make me get things done, too.
We were blessed by friends who baked and decorated the cake, arranged the flowers, acted as DJ, served as shuttle drivers, as well as those who set tables and cleaned house in preparation of the Big Day. Our landlords even provided their home and garden as the reception location.
3. Do it yourself.
There are an amazing number of things that you can do and make yourself, even moreso now than there were 18 years ago. The trick is not to overdo. (See tips 1 & 2.)
From invitations to party favors to place settings, you can pull together pretty things simply and affordably. Don’t go overboard, but consider what special touches are just fine homemade. Instead of a bar, bartender, etc, we went to Costco and bought cases of bottled water, pop, beer, and champagne and made our own serve-yourself bar.
4. Splurge on the things that matter.
I really wanted good food, nice invitations and quality photographs so we splurged on those items. Today I have friends who would have done those things for me. But, I was content to fill the gap, knowing I was getting my druthers in a few key areas.
As it was, we priced things out and still bargain shopped. We chose the same caterers I had worked for in college and since they knew me, they gave us a great deal and superb service. (It pays to know people, sometimes!) The food was absolutely fantastic!
5. Let go of the things you don’t care about.
We didn’t have a wedding planner, a videographer, or professional hair and make-up people. It didn’t bother me in the slightest that a driveway was our dance floor. I only just now noticed the basketball hoop in the photographs!
Our “live music” was a wanna-be jazz singer who literally crashed the party! He wasn’t even invited to the wedding, but wrote a song for us spontaneously at the reception.
None of this bothered me. They just didn’t matter that much in light of the big picture and small budget.
6. Just smile.
What makes a wedding a beautiful one is the happy couple. Keep smiling — even if things don’t go the way you expect them to. In fact, be ready to laugh — at losing the rings right before the ceremony, at the party-crashing jazz singer, at the dead altar flowers from a previous event catching fire during your vows. (True stories.)
There will be plenty of things to go “wrong”.
A wedding doesn’t make a marriage. A good attitude and a lot of love and grace do.
You can have a beautiful wedding on a budget — just remember what’s important.
Today’s Frugal Friday!
Time to swap ideas and inspiration for saving money.
How do YOU save money?
Please remember to follow the Frugal Friday Guidelines or be deleted.
- Post a money saving idea and explain how it is helpful in your post.
- No giveaways or deals posts.
- Recipes are allowed, but you must explain how it saves people money.
- Please include a link back to Life as MOM.
I am a big believer in small, simple, meaningful weddings {which is what we had 22 years ago!}. Around here, the trend is for huge, over-the-top, expensive weddings. My friend and I were talking about it the other day and decided that we have noticed a correlation – the bigger the wedding, the shorter the marriage lasts!
Well, that’s an interesting conclusion. The celebrities usually prove that one true, don’t they?
Way back when I got married, my Dad was willing to spend whatever, but I was the frugal one!! I had my dress made by a woman who made debutante dresses. This saved me a fortune because I was small chested and the alterations to a store gown would have been expensive. I also had my bridesmaids’ dresses made and my mother had her dress made. We used roses that a man grew in his yard and a florist arranged them for us. I ended up with huge flower arrangements for a fraction of the cost. My mother’s best friend made our cake as a wedding gift. My photographer worked for the newspaper and was very professional while inexpensive. And my husband-to-be and I had worked for a fancy hotel so we held our reception there. Although we didn’t know it, they gave us a big discount when it came time to pay (that’s the blessing of being a good employee when you are young and in college!). I used a book that is still out today to plan my wedding: Checklist for a Perfect Wedding. Everything came together perfectly and I wouldn’t have changed a thing. Just this week someone told me they had made a wedding veil for a niece and it cost $7.00 to copy the one she wanted that was $200!!! It pays to ask around for help.
When my husband and I got married in Jan. 2003, it was at the beginning of the newest developments in Iraq. As in, when a unit was alerted, they were gone within a week.
He came home from drill on Sunday night “we’re getting deployed. Do you want to get married??”
We got the license on Monday, were married the next Friday in the church I grew up in. Less than 25 people. I borrowed an outfit, a friend did hair/makeup, my mom threw a meal together and got a cake as well as sunflowers (In Iowa, in January!). It was short, quick and to the point.
He spent the next week preparing for a deployment….that didn’t come until 3 years later when I was 6 months pregnant.
Small weddings can be done! LOL
We had only been dating about a year at the time, as well.
For Christmas 2 years later, I got my “engagement” ring than I never had.
Our wedding was super frugal. We got married in a small secret chapel at our Parish. It only fit 6 people including us and the Priest. We couldn’t afford the true cost of the Church but the Priest let us pay what we could afford. I hosted a small dinner at our home and made everything myself. I baked blueberry muffins to send home as party favors.
Our day was truly about the sacrament we were participating in and the joy of starting a new life together. The only thing I regret is that we didn’t have money to go on a honeymoon:)
—
As a musician I have probably been at hundreds of weddings.
While I don’t think it’s necessary to hire a wedding planner for the entire event I do think it’s very important to have someone managing the ceremony. Not the officiant or someone in the wedding party and maybe not even a close family member. If you have more than one to attendants (and maybe even then) people need to be told what to do. Especially during the processional.
It’s amazing to me how many bridesmaids and brides start down the aisle too soon! I’ve been at many weddings where we’re either not playing at all or haven’t had a chance to switch to the right music and someone’s halfway down the aisle. When this happens it usually means the bride doesn’t get the music she requested because it’s much better for the flow of things if we just keep playing rather than scramble to swtich music. I understand people are nervous, not thinking about what’s happening, and that the 10 seconds it takes us to turn a few pages seems like an eternity. So there needs to be someone in the back of the sanctuary guiding wedding party. It makes things go much more smoothly.
Also, don’t pay for a string quartet during dinner or even cocktails. I don’t mind the extra cash, of course, but nine times out of ten there’s so much talking in the room no one can hear us. 🙂
I totally agree with me what you say about having someone in charge. My husband does LOTS of weddings and it is very frustrating for him to lead the rehearsal when no one is in charge. It can be very chaotic or else too many people try to take over.
We didn’t have a wedding coordinator but we asked my cousin and her husband to be Master and Mistress of Cermony and my aunt and uncle to be the Master and Mistress of the reception. It was so nice to hand it off to them and they did a great job. We also delegated every task. We had a high school girl in our church just be in charge of picking up lunch for the wedding party and decorate the cars. We had my little cousin pass out programs. We had another high school girl oversee the gift table. People love to be involved and help.
Congratulations! You and your guy were sure a beautiful couple!
My daughter is getting married next year. You don’t want to know what the average Long Island wedding goes for. I’m glad I raised a frugal girl ’cause she wants nothing to do with that! We’ve picked out a very reasonable place to hold the reception and she doesn’t want anything too fancy-schmancy. No $400 dollar floral arrangements on the tables (no kidding, I went to a wedding that had that), for example. As Katherine has told people who don’t get the ‘budget’ wedding thing: “My wedding is one day. My marriage is the rest of my life!”
Yeah, for a wise daughter!
I can’t remember the exact cost of our wedding in 2003, but I know we went about it in a cost-conscience manner. Our few splurges were nice flowers and excellent pictures. The flowers were used in both the ceremony and the reception. Our efficient florist and assistant grabbed them as soon as pictures were over and hustled them down to the reception. We got married in my church and used the social hall…both of which were free since I was a member. My husband’s uncle did our video as a gift…he does this type of thing on the side, so he had super nice equipment. Family friends did all the food AND cake for the price that in-town caterers were charging for only their cakes. My dress was beautiful, but definitely was not the most expensive in the store.
When it all comes down to it, the wedding is ONE DAY in the life of your MARRIAGE, and quite honestly, I’d rather have a marriage than a wedding!
I couldn’t agree more!! July will mark 14 yrs of marriage for my hubby and me, and we did it all on 2500.00. And we did it in 4 months!! He proposed on Valentines day and we were married in early July. It was alot of work, and we did most everything ourselves, and looking back to honest I would have made it alot simplier than it was!! It can be done tastefully and frugally but still be beautiful.
My husband and I did the exact same thing at our wedding and most of the guests participated in making it happen with offerings of food, flowers, dress-making skills.. And because everyone had put so much of their own personal effort into it, they enjoyed it so much more. Frugal doesn’t have to be humdrum- I think a frugal wedding is the best there is! Thanks once again for hosting- Enjoy the weekend ! Rebecca @ Natural Mothers Network ( Seasonal Celebration Sunday) x
“When Harry Met Sally”