How to Pamper Yourself Without Feeling Selfish

Mom life can be hard. It’s totally worth it, but sometimes proves challenging. A little pampering goes a long way to reenergizing you for the next best thing. Here’s how to pamper yourself without feeling selfish.

Most of the moms I know give, give, give with very little breaks for themselves. Their sense of duty is great and they are not about to squander the family’s money or time on frivolity.

But, each of us needs a little respite in her life.

We need to have a moment to breathe deep, rest, relax, and recharge. By doing so, we are ready to take on the challenges of life as well as love our families more since we don’t feel drained and exhausted.

Learning how to pamper yourself — without feeling selfish — is a great strategy to reenergizing. You can enjoy a little treat, refresh, and go back to the good work set before you.

Consider one of these easy things to add to your week. None of these is too elaborate or expensive. But each can carry a punch, each has the potential to give you that much needed boost.

Try one on for size and let me know in the comments what works for you.

Take a nap and/or go to bed early.

When your first baby is a newborn, you understand the lack of sleep. But as he grows or you add more children to the fold, you may find yourself burning the midnight oil on purpose.

Introvert moms will know that nighttime is often the only time you have to yourself!

However, sleep deprivation is good for no mom. You will be more patient and more fun if you’ve had a good amount of sleep. A nap or a good 8-9 hours of sleep is just lovely.

While the baby might not yet sleep through the night, there are ways for you to creatively get more sleep.

• Sleep when the kids sleep. Yes, the laundry can wait.
• Learn how to take a cat nap. It can be done! (Husbands have been doing it for centuries.)
• Ask your husband to put the kids to bed so you can get an early night.
• Hire a babysitter to come early in the morning so that you can sleep in. Bonus points if your husband greets her while you’re still asleep.

Give yourself a pedicure.

My sister Jamie is a manicurist. It’s always lovely to have a “real pedicure” at her hands.

But, we don’t see each other often enough for me to have pretty toes all the time. So, I’ve learned to do it myself. Even if it’s just a polish change, it’s so fun to see my toes pretty and polished.

There are so many great pedicure tutorials nowadays, it makes it easy for you to keep your toenails cute.

Soak in a tub or take a longer shower.

I do some of my best thinking under water. And I find that a hot shower or bath relaxes and rejuvenates me.

This is easy to swing once the kids are asleep, so make this a regular event on your calendar. Choose one night a week that you know is easy to put the kids to bed at an early hour. Then grab a book, a cup of tea, and go soak.

Bonus: make a batch of Lavender Milk Bath to make it extra luxurious.

If your home doesn’t have a tub, you can treat yourself to a longer shower. I love these Shower Steamers from Bootleg Bath.

Eat some chocolate.

Chocolate does all kinds of good things for you, so enjoy some this week, guilt-free. You can make it a family affair and enjoy a Slow Cooker Chocolate Cheesecake together for dessert one night. (Trust me, it’s the best!)

There are also less indulgent ways to enjoy a bit of chocolate everyday:

• Load up on bite-size dark chocolate squares. Enjoy one after lunch with the kids.
• Enjoy a Built Bar which is loaded with protein and chocolate.
• Stir cocoa powder into yogurt or cottage cheese.
• Sprinkle cocoa powder into your coffee.

Enjoy a good book.

Reading is food for the soul and mind. And while I love Bread and Jam for Frances as much as anyone, I also enjoy reading books just for me.

I recommend reading with a caveat. If you’re a woman who easily gets lost in story grip to the neglect of home and family, choose books that are less absorbing. I’ve personally learned this the hard way. It’s sometimes too easy to get lost in a book.

Lean on novellas for quick reads that won’t suck you in and dunk you under.

(Here’s my To Be Read Pile for the year.)

Treat yourself to a new lotion or beauty product.

My friend Jessika has this gardenia lotion that smells heavenly. It just fills the air with beauty.

I usually buy very utilitarian toiletries, lotions and soaps that the whole family can use. But, smelling her lotion made me want to bust out and treat myself to something that smelled so yummy.

Treat yourself to something new and fun — or play with making something from scratch, such as this Lavender Hand Scrub, made from regular pantry staples and some lavender flowers.

Buy a bouquet of flowers.

You don’t need  to wait for someone to give you flowers. Stroll through your farmer’s market or grocer’s floral area and pick out a bouquet to take home. Trader Joe’s often has very affordable bouquets.

Last summer I treated myself to this set of mini bud vases. They allow you to split up a larger bouquet for splashes of color throughout the house as well as provide an option to pick just a few stems from the backyard.

For longer-lasting blooms, consider a potted flowering plant or planting more flowers to your home’s garden beds. You’ll smile when you see it.

Make some Mom Food.

I am a firm believer in Mom Food, the meals that might seem too froofy for husband and kids, but which moms love.

Now that they’re grown, my kids love most foods, but when they were younger, they didn’t. I didn’t want to subsist on kid food, so at lunch almost every day, I made Mom Food, something just for myself.

Prepping a number of breakfasts and lunches that you like can be a small way to pamper yourself without feeling selfish.

More Self-Care Strategies

This post was originally published on February 9, 2011. It has been updated for content and clarity.